Betrayal is a common life experience. Even Jesus was betrayed by a close friend. But when it happens to you, it challenges your faith and causes you to doubt others, and can even cause you to doubt God’s goodness to you. When a friend betrays us, we can’t imagine other friends remaining loyal. Our trust in others erodes into doubt and begins a cycle in which we believe that betrayal is something we just must learn to live with. But we can act against the long-term result of betrayal. We must choose to act against each betrayal event that impedes our personal growth, faith, and trust.
Overcoming betrayal begins with forgiveness. Forgiving does not mean we accept the wrong behavior of others; it means letting go of the pain, frustration, and bitterness we’ve buried within. It means forgiving as God forgives – not letting the betrayal affect our future actions. Forgiveness is never easy but absolutely necessary if we intend to move forward. Another important way to heal from betrayal is to avoid people you don’t trust. Be selective about the people you trust with your personal well-being. Choosing to cling to people who don’t inspire faith will only lead to more distrust. Walk away from those you know are not right for you.
Decisions will be made by others that change your life forever, and there is nothing you can do to prevent it. The temptation will be to protect yourself because you fear the pain and loneliness may return. Pain and hurt come only because you have taken the risk to love. In fact, you can never truly love without the risk of loss. My prayer is that you experience so much love and acceptance in every area of your life that when betrayal appears, you will know it only as the exception in life and not the rule. There will always be someone or someones who will continue to love and support you even in the face of disappointment.